How To Overcome Self-Sabotage Part 5: Negativity

Written by: Kathy Best, CRRC, ACCR, PSDC, CNT, September 8, 2019

NegativityEveryone can all fall into this behavior now and then, especially when there is so much to scare, sicken, sadden, and shock us in the news, movies, and social media. When you find yourself constantly talking, thinking, or reacting negatively, or when you gravitate to others that tend to focus on what’s wrong with the world it may be time to address another a self-sabotaging behavior. This is another inherited behavior that can be as contagious as the flu. Many people don’t even realize how negative their attitude and talk is until someone else points it out. It can be a very destructive and unproductive behavior that takes a toll on everyone around you. It takes practice keeping your judgements and pessimistic observations to yourself. It takes an even stronger desire and focused dedication to replace this behavior with something more beneficial. Negativity affects the mind, physical body, energy body, and the soul. It’s like a virus that invades and weakens every area of your life.

The key to overcoming negativity is conscious observation. It’s easy to fall into this pattern when everyone around you is doing it. You really have to stay aware and on guard for its stealthy intrusion. A good habit to counter negativity is making a gratitude list. Another practice is taking a negative thought or statement and turning it into a neutral or positive one. This can become an entertaining game when you’re around people that tend to spend most of their time blaming, shaming, and complaining. See how many times you can take a negative statement and put a positive spin on it. You may find that the negative people start drifting away from you, because negativity and misery both love company. When you stop supporting and encouraging those behaviors in yourself you will become less attractive to others that still maintain those attitudes. This change in your personality will dramatically improve your relationship with yourself and most of the people around you. There will always be some people that criticize your positive transformation and try to drag you back into their drama or fear-based consciousness. Once you become adept at seeing fear, sadness, suffering, criticism, anger, and blame as opportunities to hold a higher mental and emotional attitude for your own well-being and the well-being of everyone around you it becomes almost easy to understand, forgive, overlook, and even ignore attempts to engage you in the old, unhealthy patterns.

The practice of controlling your emotions, instead of letting your emotions control you will help you transition from a negative outlook to a more neutral or positive outlook. It helps to examine each thought, attitude, event, and interaction that triggers your spiral into negativity. Objectively observe these triggers and follow them back to their origins. Finding the core, or root, of the behavior will help you understand and even heal the triggers that prevent you from living a happier, more fulfilling, peaceful life. This one attitude adjustment can improve your life exponentially.

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